Man… I cannot believe that it has been nearly a year since I have written anything worth reading! The tag line to my poor abandoned blog is one of my all-time favorite quotes by Benjamin Franklin, “Either write something worth reading, or do something worth writing.” I’d like to think that as of a year ago, my life was a combination of the two. In the past year I have most definitely epitomized the latter, I just have had no time or energy to write about it and my priorities have most definitely shifted!
For the latter part of my pregnancy, I was in nesting mode full steam. Any and every free moment I had focused on getting our home and life ready for our little one. It is crazy how strong that instinct to prepare was. So much for getting back into writing after I was past the nausea and fatigue that plagued me during my first trimester! I had every intention of at minimum writing a summary of my second and third trimester, but alas. I did a fair amount of journaling; this regular verbal purge proved to be an effective way to keep stress at bay, something I worked very hard on throughout my pregnancy (zen mama, zen baby!). It wasn’t exactly blogging, but at least I was able to continue writing in some capacity!
In early October, my husband and I welcomed our beautiful daughter to the world. Our sweet little girl arrived in the dark morning hours after 17 hours of labor at 8 pounds, 14 oz and was 21 inches long. ❤
To say that this was the best moment of my life would be a gross understatement. I was and am astonished at how much love I instantly felt for this little bundle. A huge fear of mine during my pregnancy was that I wouldn’t have that immediate bond with my daughter. This was absolutely not the case for me. In the hospital, I couldn’t get enough of our skin-on-skin time and couldn’t stop oogling over this creature I created! My maternal instincts kicked in immediately and my life was forever changed the minute I held that sweet girl for the first time.
As much happiness and joy that I experienced in becoming a mother, the first week home was brutal. Sleep deprivation coupled with surging and changing hormones and recovering from the most taxing thing I had ever physically done was rough to say the least. I cried more in those first few days after I was discharged from the hospital than I ever had in my life, sobbing out of sheer exhaustion one minute and crying over how in love I was with my daughter the next. Thankfully, this phase was short lived!
I was on maternity leave for six weeks and for the remainder of the year, I worked from home a few hours a day. I have since continued to work from home on a part-time basis, heading into the office once a week. This setup is ideal for our little family. I am so fortunate that I’m able to be at home with my little girl, though working from home is much harder than I ever imagined it would be. There are days when I’m lucky to get an hour of work in, and my gosh do I feel like an utter failure on those days. That being said, I love being able to be the one to watch her learn and grow each and every day. It is certainly not easy, but it is so, so worth it.
I’ve managed to find a balance with working and being a stay-at-home mom, but that isn’t the only area we’ve found some equilibrium. My husband and I have always been lovers of the outdoors; camping, backpacking, and hiking being activities we have enjoyed doing together since we met. It was a goal of ours to keep this aspect of our lifestyle going strong even after we had children, and I’m happy to say that we have succeeded! Nature has always been a place of solitude and serenity for us, a place to relax and recharge. I’m so happy that our daughter is loving the outdoors as well. The bigger she gets the more alert and attentive she is, and watching her stare up at the tree tops with those big eyes is just priceless! I am so looking forward to our first camping trip this summer, and taking her on longer hikes and backpacking trips as she gets older.
I cannot believe that she is going to be 6 months old in a few weeks! Half a year has gone by in the blink of an eye. Each milestone she hits is so bittersweet. I’m so proud of her and love seeing her grow and develop, but I have to kiss goodbye that previous phase at the same time which is just heartbreaking. Being as present as I possibly can and striving to savor each and every moment, taking the good with the bad, has been and will continue to be my top priority, a drastic lifestyle shift that I wouldn’t change for the world.
Now that I’m finally crawling out of the new parent fog I’ve been in the past few months, and have managed to finally find my groove, I’m ready to (attempt to) start factoring in time to write and blog again. I’m not going to set any goals for myself this go around as I only end up being discouraged when I fail to hit those objectives. This phase of my life is so fleeting in the grand scheme of things. While slightly disappointing, at the end of the day have no regrets that I haven’t managed to keep up with my blog as I know this is just a season which will be over all too quickly. I’ll write when I can and will gradually get back into more regular posts, hopefully sooner than later! 🙂